“Our patience will achieve more than our force.” - Edmund Burke
Patience is a life skill that must be learned early because it is not only important for our academic growth but probably at every stage in our lives. Over time, we learn patience, yet as parents, we can make an effort to teach our kids early in life through ways in which they can understand. Patience helps us to achieve more by urging us not to give up and keep trying through learning and effort.
"Whether your child is naturally patient or not, you can do a lot to help her learn by starting early," says Claire Lerner, LCSW, a child development specialist at the nonprofit organization Zero to Three.
Why patience is important for kids?
1) Helps to improve academic performance- Helps them focus on their studies and increases concentration during exams and other assignments.
2) Reduced Stress: Patience helps students to stay calm even in stressful situations. This reduces their stress levels and helps them to cope with academic pressures.
3) Better Social Skills: Patience is an important aspect of social interaction and interpersonal dynamics. By teaching children to be patient, they can learn to listen to others, understand different perspectives, and communicate effectively.
4) Improved Emotional Intelligence: Patience is a key element of emotional intelligence. By learning to be patient, kids can regulate their emotions and develop empathy for others.
How parents can help their children work on their patience?
1) Start with small steps: Don’t think that your child will start exhibiting patience right away. So, start with small things like asking them to wait for 1 minute as you prepare a snack. If they can do it, move to the next one like waiting for 5 mins to catch their favourite show because someone else might be watching the TV. Gradually, show them how to wait for turns at the playground for the swing or in the class for some toy they want to play with.
2) Delayed gratification: Instant gratification is one of the major hurdles in building. If your child needs something, don’t just get it for them instantly. Sometimes, think about whether they need it right away or it can be delayed. This way you can teach them to wait for things and also learn the value of things and gratitude. Research shows that kids who can delay gratification have higher scores, lower BMIs, and appear to be more successful overall.
3) Create opportunities: Think about ways to make your child go through a state where they need to practice patience like waiting in a queue at a store or waiting for dinner, etc. Ask them how they would want to utilize that time to do something constructive rather than sulking or fretting. When you go to the park, watch over their reactions when they have to wait for their turn. Intervene, if required. Help them with lessons on mindfulness and small mind activities to calm their mind if they feel impatient and agitated. Help them divide their task into goals and show them how patience can help them proceed at every step.
4) Acknowledge and Reinforce: It is very important to acknowledge their efforts and appreciate them if they have done a good job. Affirmation also works to make them realize that they have reached their goal through their patience and effort rather than giving up if faced with a challenge. Make it a positive experience for them.
5) Use games and activities: Games that focus on taking turns are best for this purpose. Family-friendly board games such as ‘Candy Land’ or ‘Connect 4’ or even ‘Hide and Seek’ or ‘Hot and Cold’ are perfect to teach your child to wait. Your children will learn self-control and patience during a fun activity without even realizing that they are learning. While playing, you can say things like “now that your turn is over, you need to observe how others are playing so that you can plan your next move”. For older kids, Chess can be a very good game for practicing patience.
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